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| Hey all! Once again it is me, Chris Moody. On this page I will be mentioning some of my thoughts, giving you some stupid jokes that I've picked up, and some pretty interesting insights on some historical events. Thoughts: Now, some people know me pretty well. Those people could tell you that I think a lot. Sometimes that's not always a good thing, but sometimes I have some pretty deep thoughts. I could be driving in my car, washing dishes or sweeping at work, or just laying down in my bed at night and I will just start thinking. Here are some of the things I think about... ---Now I am not the most out-going catholic in the world, but I do believe in and love Jesus Christ. One thing I think about though, the Virgin Mary gave birth to Jesus, but did the Virgin Mary die a virgin too? Or did she and Joseph ever have more kids? I always try to start reading the Bible, but I never get too far. So I don't know if she had any more kids or not. If you know the answer to this, please inform me. ---Another religious event I'm not too sure about is Lint. I have still yet to figure out why we have Lint. I'm not sure if it has to do with Jesus or what. I heard someone say they thought it had to do with Moses. But I believe it has to do with Jesus. Maybe one day I'll learn the truth as to why we have Lint. Same as before, if you know the answer to this I would really like to know. ---Sometimes, late at night when I'm laying in bed, I'll think about my funeral. I always wonder what my funeral will be like. When I attended the only funeraly I've ever been to, I remember seeing all sorts of things in the coffin. Stuff like pictures and other things that held a sentimental meaning. I wonder what people will put in my coffin. I also wonder what people will say at my funeral. I wonder who will attend and what kind of reaction they would have on their face. Are they sad or are they happy to see me go? I know thinking about your own funeral may seem kind of conceited. But hey, at times I can be conceited. ---When it comes to contact sports like football, a game I love and have played for many years, I wonder about pain. I mean, you see a player get hit real hard, yet its those hits you don't feel. When you barely get hit, those are the hits that inflict the most pain. I have played the game so I have some experience in that. I would take a hit and I would have a lot of my teammates and friends ask me if that hit hurt. I would say no. Yet, I will get hit and have no one ask me anything cause it was a soft hit, but those hits hurt me more than the monster ones. It's just like Nascar racing. You see cars get airborne and all torn up and in flames, yet you see the driver walk away with a few scratches. Dale Earnhardt, bless his soul, was in a routine crash into the wall that didn't look bad in the least but it took his life. Why is that? ---I also wonder what could've been? I like to consider myself a pretty good quarterback. I started for J.V. and helped lead the team to a tie for district champs. I feel I throw a very good ball anywhere from short yardage to 45 yards deep. Anything past that I can still throw, just with a little less accuracy. But as a quarterback, accuracy is everything. I also feel I was a decent runner. When needed, I would run the ball. But all that ended when my knee continued to give me problems during the off season after my sophomore season. I still feel the drive in me to play football. It is the game that I love, yet my step-mom doesn't know why people want to play the game. What would've happened if my knees weren't messed up? How good could I have been? ---Here's one I think most people have thought about at least once in their life. I know I have thought about it many times. Why is it when your friend tells you something it doesn't bother you? But if the person you love tells you the same thing you get mad at them? Or when your friend does something it doesn't bother you, but when the person you love does the same thing, you get mad? I have experience in that too but I'm not going into details on that one. That's why it's called a personal life. But why is that? ---But more than anything else, I wonder how my life is going to turn out. Will I be a good history teacher? Will I be a good coach? Will I be a good husband and father? I love history, I just hope I will be good at teaching it. I love sports, I hope I can help the younger generation to get better and win while I'm at it. I have good parents so I'm hoping I learned a few things along the way as to being a good parent. But I do think of my future a lot. Dumb Jokes: The dumb jokes you're about to read I got from my Algebra II teacher. I'm guessing some of the numbers and measurements are realistic, so it might be kind of informative as well. If I actually wanted to I could take the time to see if these numbers were right, but that's too boring for me. But if you feel up to it, you can do it. --Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter: Eskimo Pi --2000 pounds of Chinese soup: Won Ton --1 millionth of a mouthwash: 1 Microscope --Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement: 1 Bananosecond --Half of a large intestine: 1 Semicolon --1000 aches: 1 Kilohertz --Basic unit of laryngitis: 1 Hoarsepower --Shortest unit between two jokes: A straight line (think about it) --453.6 graham crackers: 1 Pound cake --1 million microphones: 1 Megaphone --1 million bicycles: 2 Mega cycles --2000 mockingbirds: Two kilomockingbirds --10 cards: 1 Decacards --10 rations: 1 Decaration --100 rations: 1 C-ration --1 kilogram of falling figs: 1 Fig Newton --8 nickels: 2 Paradigms --3 statute miles of intravaneous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital: 1 I.V. League --100 senators: Not 1 Decision Historical Insights: Have you ever wondered what was the meaning behind the Christmas Carol "The 12 Days of Christmas"? Did you know there was a meaning behind it? Also, did you know all the eerie similarities between Abraham Lincoln and John F. Kennedy? Well, I'm about to give you some historical insight to "The 12 Days of Christmas" and the similarities between two of our presidents. 12 Days of Christmas: From 1558 to 1829, Roman Catholics in England were not permitted to practice their faith openly. Someone during this time period wrote this carol as a catechism song for young Catholics. It has two levels of meaning: the surface meaning and one hidden meaning known only by the members of the church. Each element in the carol has a code word for a religious reality which the children could remember. ---The partridge in a pear tree was Jesus Christ. ---Two turtle doves were the Old and New Testaments. ---Three French hens stood for faith, hope, and love. ---The four calling birds were the four gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. ---The five golden rings recalled the Torah or Law, the first five books of the Old Testament. ---The six geese a-laying stood for the six days of creation. ---The seven swans a-swimming represented the sevenfold gifts of the Holy Spirit->Prophesy, Serving, Teaching, Exhortation, Contribution, Leadership, and Mercy. ---The eight maids a-milking were the eight beatitudes. ---Nine ladies dancing were the nine fruits of the Holy Spirit->Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self Control. ---The ten lords a-leaping were the ten commandments. ---The eleven pipers piping stood for the eleven faithful desciples. ---The twelve drummers drumming symbolized the twelve points of belief in the Apostles' Creed. Abraham Lincoln and John F. Kennedy similarities: ---Abe Lincoln was elected to congress in 1846 ---John F. Kennedy was elected to congress in 1946 ---Abe Lincoln was elected President in 1860 ---John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960 ---The names Lincoln and Kennedy each contain seven letters ---Both were particularly concerned with civil rights ---Both wives lost their children while living in the White House ---Both Presidents were shot on a Friday ---Both Presidents were shot in the head ---Lincoln's secretary was named Kennedy ---Kennedy's secretary was named Lincoln ---Both were assassinated by southerners ---Both were succeeded by southerners named Johnson ---Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808 ---Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908 ---John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839 ---Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939 ---Both assassins were known by their three names ---Both assassins names are composed of 15 letters ---Lincoln was shot at the theater named 'Ford' ---Kennedy was shot in a car called 'Lincoln' (which is a Ford) ---Booth ran from the theater and was caught in a warehouse ---Oswald ran from a warehouse and was caught in the theater ---Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials ***And here is the kicker*** ---A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland ---A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe Something for thought: My sister sent me this email with this poem. It makes you think if you read the words and allow them to sink in. Maybe later on I'll put some of my own poetry on this page. Slow Dance: Have you ever watched kids On a merry-go-round? Or listened to the rain Slapping on the ground? Ever follow a butterfly's erratic flight? Or gazed at the sun into the fading night? You better slow down. Don't dance so fast. Time is short. The music won't last. Do you run through each day On the fly? When you ask, "How are you?" Do you hear the reply? When the day is done Do you lie in your bed With the next hundred chores Running through your head? You better slow down. Don't dance so fast. Time is short. The music won't last. Ever told your child, We'll do it tomorrow? And in your haste, Not see his sorrow? Ever lost touch, Let a good friendship die Cause you never had time To call and say, "Hi"? You'd better slow down. Don't dance so fast. Time is short. The music won't last. When you run so fast to get somewhere You miss half the fun of getting there. When you worry and hurry through your day, It's like an unopened gift... Thrown away. Life is not a race. Do take it slower. Hear the music. Before the song is over. I received an email from my friend Tomas which I would like to share with you. I also received an email from my friend Bianca which I would also like to share with you. Lessons From MOM: *My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE--"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning!" *My mother taught me RELIGION--"You better pray that will come out of the carpet." *My mother taught me TIME TRAVEL--"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!" *My mother taught me LOGIC--"Because I said so, that's why." *My mother taught me FORESIGHT--"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident." *My mother taught me IRONY--"Keep crying and I'll GIVE you something to cry about." *My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS--"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!" *My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM--"Will you LOOK at the dirt on the back of your neck!" *My mother taught me about STAMINA--"You'll sit there 'til all that spinach is finished." *My mother taught me about WEATHER--"It looks like a tornado swept through your room." *My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS--"If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you; would you listen then?" *My mother taught me about HYPOCRICY--"If I've told you once, I've told you a million times, DON'T EXAGGERATE!!!" *My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE--"I brought you into this world and I can take you out of it." *My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION--"Stop acting like your father!" *My mother taught me about ENVY--"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!" THANKS MOM!!! I Believe: ---I believe that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life. ---I believe that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be. ---I believe that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them. ---I believe that you can keep going long after you can't. ---I believe that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel. ---I believe that either you control your attitude or it controls you. ---I believe that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place. ---I believe that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences. ---I believe that money is a lousy way of keeping score. ---I believe that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time. ---I believe that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up. ---I believe that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel. ---I believe that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love. ---I believe that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have. ---I believe that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've had. ---I believe that your family won't always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people you aren't related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren't biological. ---I believe that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that. ---I believe that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself. ---I believe that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief. ---I believe that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become. ---I believe that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do. ---I believe that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change. ---I believe that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever. ---I believe that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different. ---I believe that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you. ---I believe that when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help. ---I believe that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being. ---I believe that people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon. Now you remember your classrooms right? How they have some kind of motivational or influential phrases or posters on the wall? Well here are some of those: --We accomplish in proportion to what we attempt. --To achieve all that is possible we must attempt the impossible. --A sunset is a sunrise on the other side of the world. --Be not afraid of moving slowly; be afraid only of standing still. (reminds me of me.) *And my personal favorite* --Practice does not make perfect. Perfect practice makes perfect. (Vince Lambordi) Well that is all for this page for now. Later on when I come across more dumb jokes I will post some more. Or if I find anything else I think is interesting and I want to share, I will post it. If you have any answers to some of my thoughts or have any jokes or anything you would like to send me to post, please email it to me. You may also sign the guestbook if you wish. You may also read more on the following topics: Life: www.maxpages.com/cmoody13 Sports: www.maxpages.com/cmoody16 Love: www.maxpages.com/cmoody22 |
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