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| rape is when someone forces you to have sexual intercourse against your will - whether you are passed out, too drunk to refuse, too scared to argue, or for some other reason do not give consent. 1 in 4 college women have experienced rape or attempted rape since age 14. 9 in 10 acquaintance rapes are not reported. 1 in 12 college men admit to acts that meet legal definitions of rape. yet few of these men identify themselves as rapists. 10 things you can do to protect yourself against date rape: 1) remember that you always have the right to say no! even if: --you have been making out. --you have been drinking. --you have had sex before. --you said yes before - then changed your mind. --your partner says, "you owe me." --you are dressed in sexy clothes. --you think he/she will get mad. 2) use caution. --do not go off alone with someone you do not know well or who makes you uncomfortable - trust your instincts. --suggest hanging out with a group, going to a public place, or double dating instead. 3) be aware of different kinds of pressure. rape is when someone forces you to have sex. that force can be: --not stopping when you say no. --threatening to hurt you. --physically holding you down. --using a weapon such as a knife or gun. --having sex with you when you're too high or drunk to say no. it may also be if the person: --threatens to tell other people you had sex if you don't give in. --makes it seem like something worse will happened if you don't give in. --says things like, "if you don't, i'll hurt myself." 4) be clear about your limits: --if someone is pushing you to have sex when you don't want to - say "no" clearly. --don't be afraid of hurting his/her feelings. if you don't say no clearly, he/she may think you are okay with what is happening. --remember, if the person doesn't listen to no, it's not your fault. 5) stay in charge. --staying in charge means saying what you want and knowing what you are doing. --avoid drinking and using drugs. they make if hard for you to stay in charge. --call your parents or a trusted friend to come pick you up if you are unsure of your safety. --always carry money for cab fare and change for a phone call. --remember, it is better to get into trouble for being somewhere you shouldn't be, than to get raped. 6) watch for danger signs: --if a person does not listen to you at other times, he/she may not listen to you in a sexual setting. --if a person seems to like it if you are uncomfortable, he/she may not respect your limits. 7) if you are afraid to say no: --if you think saying no will make the situation worse, say you have to go to the bathroom. then go make a phone call for help. --it is OK to lie to protect yourself. 8) what if the person doesn't listen to no? --say "no" again loudly. --say "stop. you are not listening. you need to respect my limits!" 9) fight back. --if the person uses physical force, fight back! try to get away! --push him/her away - hard! stomp on his/her toes, knee him in the groin, poke him/her in the eyes. --yell loudly for help. run to where there are other people. 10) get help. --if you don't feel like you can say no or fight back, take a self defense class. --if someone tries to rape you or if you have been raped, get help as soon as possible. talk to a trusted adult, contact your local rape crisis center, or call the police. --remember, if a person doesn't listen to you, it's not your fault! what to do if you are raped: --go to a safe place. --call police. --go to a hospital emergency room.-the police will take you if you ask. --accept emotional support. ask the police to call a friend or family member, a victims advocate, or a local rape services consultant program. --DO NOT, shower, bathe, change clothes, douche, or straighten up the area of assault. *please remember, that rape is never ever ever your fault. no matter how badly the person makes you feel, no matter how much they tell you that you asked for it. it is NEVER your fault. if you can't report it to the police, please make sure you talk to someone about it. we can overcome this together, and we can fight back. |
 aj.gillespie@home.com |
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